de compen sation

If when I look you in the eye... you just see through me

as I stroke your back... I see you clutching at dreams

if all these moments I treasure... you lose them,

let them fade away...

Who's left holding the pain?

If I’m the only one... bleeding from this wound.

If my knuckles break... on a punching bag that’s fallen

and my words... slide in one ear to shoot out the other,

Do I have the right to bare my shame?

If I’m longing for you... as I fade from your remembrance,

If I can’t love you no more... bent with my nails digging on the pavement.

If every kiss I laid atop your lips... just splashed

across your throat.

Didn’t you expect that I’d let go?

If you’re allowing, old love of my life,

all those feelings

that I treasured on your behalf

for the years that won’t come...

to slide down the stream and off the rails,

Who’ll be surprised when I’m insane?

And didn’t you see it loom?

the note that pulls the lid on this minor blues

and the ink that wounds the score

scalded,

running, like blackened tears

drop after drop

into the sea?

Like the tears of those

who misplaced their one dream?